What Does Your Drink Say About You?

By Peach in DC Clubs, DC Lounges, Get in Style
Thursday, February 23, 2012, 6:36pm. (Updated: 10/24/13 at 4:17pm) Add comments

What Message Does Your Drink Order Send?

What you drink says a lot. Whether you’re at clubs in DC or the local bar, what you’re holding says a lot about who you are and how you’re seen.
You could keep reading and avoid looking like a douche… Or you could say, “F*** it. I’m a grown man and I’ll drink my Pina Colada right here, in front of everyone!”
Amaretto Sour

Amaretto SourYou just turned 21, or you have a fake ID.

Jager Bombs

Jersey Shore GuysYou’re out with the boys, looking to forget something, and probably will.

There’ll def be some fist pumping and high-fiving.

You’re a 22-year-old freshmen.

Vodka & Cranberry

Drunk GirlsBORING!

You probably approached the bartender like a deer in headlights asking, “what kind of drinks do you have here?” while looking at a fully stocked bar.

Long Island

You want to get as hammered as possible off one drink.

You probably won’t tip your bartender.

You’ll probably ask them to make it “a strong island”.

Old Fashioned

MixologistYou probably throw around words like “mixology”.



Sex in the City CosmoYou were too young to catch Sex in the City the first time around and are now catching up on the reruns on TBS.

Straight Vodka

Lindsay Lohan DUIYou probably have a drinking problem and at least one DUI.

Bud Light

White Trash Bud LightYou drove at least 30 minutes to get to this club from a town nobody’s heard of.

You may live in a trailer and possibly had a baby when you were in high school.


TequilaYou’re down to get hammered… or get the girl you want to sleep with hammered.

It’s the closest thing you can get to a roofie without getting arrested.

If you ask for it chilled then you’re a p*ssy too.

Kir Royal (Champagne and Chambord

StrippersYou spend your days riding a pole for creepy businessmen at the strip club by the airport.

Probably the lunch shift.

Wine (without a meal)

Yuppie Wine TastingYou’re a middle-aged mom out on the town.

You’re trying to act ‘classy’ while snubbing those around you who are CLEARLY not as well-to-do as you.

Afterall, you shop at Ann Taylor.

White Zinfandel

White Zin ChuggingThe Kool-Aid of wine.

You probably have a box of white zin in your fridge you were pounding during your pre game.

You probably got sick of the box and decided to take the bag out and squeeze it in your mouth,

Beer (girls)

Drinking Beer You think drinking beer makes you look like ‘one of the guys’, cool, and fun.

It worked. The guys think you’re one of them – a stank burping fool.

Hennessy, Hypnotiq

Ghetto DrinksYou let rap music influence your tastes; you wish you had a set of gold teeth.

You may wear like to wear Fubu, Timbs and sunglasses in the club.

You definitely just came from dinner at Applebee’s.

Jack (girls)

girls drinking jackYou look dirty

You may not have showered today.

You have a tramp stamp and want to look hard-core.

Bloody Mary

drunk girl toiletYou had a rough night of drinking and will probably do it again tonight.


Hipster PBRHipster Alert!

You think you’re being ‘ironically’ funny by growing a moustache, wearing skinny jeans and rocking a floppy hat.

You either have no job or are a pretend DJ.

Captain & Coke

Guy with popped collarsYou are cocky, pop your collar and your parents pay your rent.

Sex on the Beach, Pina Colada, Apple Martini

Girl with 2 Gross DrinksGuys – You’re going home alone and probably have a tab at Red Lobster.

Girls – You can’t handle your liquor and will be puking these rainbow concoctions out in no time.


James Bond MartiniYou’re trying to be sophisticated like James Bond.

You don’t really know what’s in it and how drunk you’re gonna get but man will you look sharp!


Kamikaze PlaneBecause this is the only shot you have ever heard of.

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